Somewhere between a seven octave voice, enormous hands and feet, and the coordination of an elephant on skates, every adolescent male finally discovers for the first time that there are others in the world besides himself-GIRLS! Although God starts preparing us for this ultimate encounter at this time, left to our own devices, we inevitably fail miserably at those silly little games. Remember the game about "asking the girl out?" Sweaty palm, palpitating heart, anxiety attacks, and that just before you even picked up the phone! Girls, you have no idea what it took to dial your number. Cannot imagine how many times we had to hang up on you just to work up the courage to even croak out a hello....

There is also something powerfully defiant in those raging hormones. It was about this time that I discovered that my next calling in self discovery was to defy all authority. It is amazing that my parents did not choose to sell me off into slavery. The horribly bad decisions, the incredibly dumb mistakes, the unforgettable and unforgivable trials and tribulations I dragged them through.....

I can never again look at a grey hair on their heads and question from where it comes......